similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
