Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
