That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
