if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
