Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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