idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Someone shit on the floor
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
