everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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