i already hear my dad disowning me
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
