I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
