guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I just want nice things and good sex
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
