Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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