i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
