I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
