one word: firstdatebathroomanal
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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