it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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