we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
