Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
