The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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