If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You smell like stripper and shame
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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