i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
