If i come over, it means nothing
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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