didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
