Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
She bit a glass in half.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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