It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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