I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
