shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize