Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
