I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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