Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
