i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
