I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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