then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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