Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Randomize
