She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
