He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
