Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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