i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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