pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
