No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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