Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
