I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
