erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
