I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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