:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
