Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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