both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
