vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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