Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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