Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
