so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
