So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
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